In Which I Make You All Cry

So recently I realized that I am way too nice of a person. I’ve spent the last two years trying and hopefully succeeding to make you all laugh. But I can’t simply be known as “that funny blogger fellow” forever; studies show that blogs that feature emotional content receive significantly better stats and are much more likely to get Freshly Pressed. Sure, I’ve already been Freshly Pressed (thanks, WordPress!), but as the late Martin Luther King, Jr. once said, “The only thing cooler than getting FP’d once, is getting FP twice. #Secondtime’round.”

Now, there are many strategies you could use in order to provoke an emotional response in your reader, but it basically boils down to two:

  1. You could dazzle them with a brilliant, poignantly written story about something that happened in your childhood, or:
  2. You could just steal other people’s content.

I’m going with option #2.

Now, if you follow these steps, you will be rewarded with tears flowing down your face. And will be rewarded with a FP’d post, and maybe even be nominated for the 2015 Pulitzer Prize Awards:

Step 1: Play Hans Zimmer’s soundtrack “Time,” from Inception. I took the liberty of posting the video below.

Step 2: Click here to see the article “40 Of The Most Powerful Photographs Ever Taken.”

Step 3: Take about five to ten seconds to look at and properly absorb each picture. Make sure to read the description below. Oh, and ignore #15. That picture doesn’t really belong.

Step 4: Try not to cry.

Step 5: Cry.

Step 6: Come back here and comment with your thoughts.

Step 7: Buy me a bagel. I like bagels.

Disclaimer: I didn’t come up with this idea on my own. I got it from a YouTube comment. But that was so long ago that I can’t find said comment anymore. If anyone can find this commenter, you must find him (i think it was a him) and thank him on my behalf.

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9 Replies to “In Which I Make You All Cry”

    1. I’m flattered, but the point of this post was to make you cry, not to laugh. The fact that you didn’t immediately burst into tears shows that this post is nothing but a failure. *deletes blog*

      (And my God, I took a long time to respond. Sorry about that.)

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