Ten Books I Plan to Read in 2017

My last post like this was all the way back in 2015, and it’s funny because I still haven’t read most of those books. But this year will be different, I say, for the fourth year in a row.

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1) The Winds of Winter, by George R. R. Martin.

That’s right, I’m calling it. This book will be published this year. I know I said this last year and the the year before that, but I mean it this time. I mean, he has to finish it eventually, right?


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What a boring cover

2) Perks of Being a Wallflower, by Stephen Chbosky

I pick this book because it’s short, it’s supposed to be great, as well as an easy read. That’s what I love about YA books: they’re all quick to read, even when they’re bad. Plus, Emma Watson was in the movie adaptation, and come to think of it, I haven’t seen her act in anything since Harry Potter, so I hope to watch it after finishing this. 

Image result for extremely loud and incredibly close3) Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, by Jonathon Safran Foer

I remember seeing the trailer to this movie and thinking, “I don’t know what this is about, but I like it.” I never got to see to see the movie, but I heard the reviews for both it and the book were very divisive. It was either the most beautiful, heartwarming novel you’ve ever read, or a three hundred page piece of trash that belongs in the depths of hell.

I will get to decide which it is.

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4) The Kite Runner, by Khaled Hosseini

Fun fact, I actually read the first fifty pages or so, and found it fascinating. Sure, the main character was kind of a jerk to his friend, but I assume he’ll grow out of that. Plus I really want to learn more about the history of the middle east. The gist of what I know is this: Afghanistan got fucked over real bad in the 1970s, and I’m pretty sure the Russians were responsible, because the Russians are sort of awful like that. Although I’m sure the U.S. was also at fault in one way or another, because at one point in the novel Henry Kissinger was mentioned, and that guy’s famous for being a bit of a war criminal. Either way, I doubt this book has a happy ending.

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5) The Road, by Cormac McCarthy

I also read about 80 pages into this book, and I loved every moment of it. Although I do find it kind of arrogant of the author to just ignore the rules of punctuation. “Pff, I don’t need commas or quotation marks,” I can imagine him thinking. “My story is just that powerful.

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6) Doctor Sleep, by Stephen King

I know, I know. It’s been over three years and I still haven’t read this book. However, I recently started getting back into King’s Dark Tower series, after putting it aside for a long time, so I think I’m ready to go back into his work. 

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7) The Price of Salt, by Patricia Highsmith

It’s a romance novel about two lesbians in the fifties, which was recommended to me by Engie from Musings from Neville’s Navel. While I wasn’t a fan of The Maze Runner, I do tend to love most of the books she recommends me. Like A Game of Thrones, or Between the World and Me, or The Miseducation of Cameron Post. Or V for Vendetta.

So intend to get around to reading this book, and the pages will be soaked with my heart-shaped tears.

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8) Life, the Universe, and Everything, by Douglas Adams

This is the third book in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy series, and if it’s half as funny as the first two, I will be in for a good time. 

Seriously, though. You know how rare it is for me to laugh out loud when reading a book? Usually I just smile, or exhale out of my nose, but Adams sends me into fits. And then I find myself thinking about scenes from the books months afterwards and I crack up again, and then I have to explain to people why I just started laughing for seemingly no reason.

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9) I Am Legend, by Richard Matheson.

I remember seeing the Will Smith movie adaptation for this, and thinking, “meh, seven out of ten.” But apparently the book is completely different? Also, the book is currently sitting on a shelf in my basement, and no one knows how it got there, which adds quite a bit to its mystique.

10) Maggie Stiefvater’s new book, whatever it is.

Stiefvater’s become one of those authors whose books I would immediately buy the moment they were released. Other authors include John Green, Markus Zusak, George R. R. Martin, and Suzanne Collins. If any of them publish a new book this year, I guarantee I’ll be buying it, no matter what the circumstances.

So what are you planning to read this year? And if you’ve read any of the novels above, feel free to share your (non-spoilery) thoughts. Oh, and Happy New Year!

Nothing Like an Award to Keep Your Spirits Up…

So throughout the past couple months, I’ve received a bunch of awards. This isn’t surprising, (I mean, have you met me?) but I’m flattered nonetheless. Most of these awards were season-based, so I decided to go with the one nomination that doesn’t belong to a specific time of the year: the Sunshine Blogger Award.

I was nominated by the always snazzy Katie Nichols. She’s only tried to kill me twice this year, so I’m extra thankful.

The rules:

–Thank the person who nominated you in a blog post and link back to their blog. (Check!)

–Answer the 11 questions sent by the person who nominated you. (Yeah, not happening.)

–Nominate 11 new blogs to receive the award and write them 11 new questions. (Also not doing this, because Standards.)

–List the rules and display the Sunshine Blogger Award logo in your post and/or on your blog.


1.  If you could only read one fictional book for the rest of your life, what would it be?

It would probably be a really dense book; one where you’ll discover something new each time you read it. So if you’re allowed to pick a series, I’d pick A Song of Ice and Fire, and if you’re allowed to pick just one book, it would be Jonathon Strange and Mr. Norrell. I haven’t read it yet, but I heard it’s good and long, so a reread would probably be rewarding.

2.  What type of computer do you use for blogging?

My chromebook. Bought it over a year ago for 180 bucks and it’s been working like a charm ever since. #quitethebargain

3.  What was the last album you listened to straight through?

Atlas: Year One, by Sleeping at Last. This is one of those albums where every song sounds good, but only handful can give you an actual eargasm. Those three songs were Earth, Saturn, and Neptune. Listen … if you dare.

4.  What is your favorite holiday sweet?

Come to think of it, I don’t really like any food that goes specifically with a certain holiday. I guess I do like the Christmas-themed designs of Coca-Cola cans.

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Those polar bears would maul you to death if they got the chance.

5.  Are you known for making a signature dish or food?  If so, what is it?

I don’t cook much, but I do make scrambled eggs and toast. I can also make microwavable popcorn with ease. 

6.  Would you consider your handwriting to be sloppy or neat (or somewhere in between)?

Depends on the pen and my current state of mind. That being said, it’s always legible.

7.  What is the awesomest-looking book you own, and why?

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That’s not my hand, by the way. Photo credit goes to MightyGirl.com.

You may not be that impressed, but I think the cover sets the tone for the book perfectly. And it can’t be stressed enough just how good the paperback Stephen King books feel in your hands. The pages feel so clean, the font is so easy on the eyes … in fact just writing this makes me want to buy another King novel.

8.  Name your three biggest fandoms.

Bitch please. I don’t do fandoms. Fandoms are for dweebs and dorks and no-lifes, not for a cool dude like me. I do have a reversible belt, after all.

That being said: 1) Harry Potter. I don’t talk about the series much these days, but it will never not hold a special place in my heart. 2) A Song of Ice and Fire. I could talk about these books for days. 3) No idea. There’s probably a Stephen King fandom I’d get along well with. Maybe The Raven Cycle. Those were good books. Hopefully I’ll write something one day that inspires a fandom;  my dream is to get death threats in the mail after killing off a beloved character.

9.  Favorite childhood movie?

Finding Nemo. It’s funny, and an emotional rollercoaster? But how?

10.  Pizza or tacos?

Sicilian pizza any day of the week. With tacos, the shell always breaks on the first bite.

11.  Name three books that everyone on earth should read.

Keep in mind that I’m not picking these books necessarily because they’re my favorite, but because I like the message behind them.

  1. Mother Night, by Kurt Vonnegut. In part because I think it deserves more attention than Vonnegut’s more famous work, but also because I think it has some really neat things to say regarding morality and whatnot. Plus, in a world where millions of World War II books are published each year, Vonnegut managed to write one with a fresh perspective. (That last point is true for a lot of his books. But this is one is even fresher.)
  2. The Miseducation of Cameron Post, by Emily Danforth. There’s a movie adaptation coming out soon, so the book should be getting a nice boost in popularity, but then again, the movie rarely does the book justice. So just read it already. It’s about a lesbian growing up with a very conservative family in 1990s Montana, who gets sent to a gay conversion camp. Some thoughts:
    • It’s about the importance of understanding people and respecting them for who they are.
    • It’s also sort of glorified pot and normalized shoplifting, but I’m okay with that.
    • I feel like, in most stories like this, you’d expect the conservative relatives and the people running the camp to be demonized — to be written like one-dimensional homophobes taken straight out of an after-school special. But nope, they’re written with just as much humanity as anyone else. It would’ve been so easy for the author to write them off as Evil, but she didn’t, and for that, I salute her.
  3. It, by Stephen King. Sure, it’s violent and scary, and it ends with a bizarre, offensive sex scene that makes it clear the author was snorting coke while writing it. (Apparently he remained high during the editing and revision stage, and so was his editor.) Nevertheless, the things King has to say regarding friendship and childhood are powerful, and should still be relevant for years to come.
    • I also want everyone to be just as scared as clowns as I am.
    • Should note that while it’s been over four years since I read it, I can still remember characters like Stuttering Bill, Bevvy, and Richie “Trashmouth” Tozier, and some scenes — the rock fight, Ben’s first encounter with Henry Bowers, the part where Pennywise takes the form of a security guard with a dog’s head, (that was weird) — are still etched in my mind, and will probably never go away.
  4. Bonus Mention: V for Vendetta, and 1984. I can’t help but feel like these two books, (especially 1984, with its Groupthink and Newspeak) are becoming increasingly relevant.

And that is all! Thank you Katie, and thank you, America. I wont be nominating anyone, because I wouldn’t want to be a bother. Good night. Sweet Dreams. Don’t let the bed bugs eat open your veins and crawl around your circulatory system.

Game of Thrones: Season 5: To Watch or Not to Watch?

I am a hardcore fan of A Song of Ice and Fire, which may surprise some of you, considering how I never talk about it. Ever. Like, not even a little bit. So like many people across the globe, I am struggling with a bit of a dilemma. A conundrum, if you will. 

Thanks to George R. R. Martin’s notoriously slow writing pace (which isn’t even that slow, when you consider the sheer length and complexity of his books), the show has now reached the point where the show is going to finish before the books do, and it’s probably going to happen in this season. And now I’m stuck with the decision: do I continue watching the show and having the books spoiled, or I do I try to ignore the show and wait God knows how long for the next book to come out?

I started off by watching the show. I watched the full first season and loved every moment. Then my HBO subscription canceled at the worst possible time, and instead of just enjoying watching gratuitous nudity and people dying horrible, I was forced to read about it instead. And I know this may annoy some of you hardcore show fans when I say this, but the books are just so much better.

Don’t get me wrong, the show is brilliant and for the most part did a great job, particularly with characters like Cersei, Arya and Sam. (Stannis? Not so much.) And even when the show went off course, I didn’t care because I understood the reasoning behind most of the changes and I liked how it turned out. 

It’s understandable though, that with only ten episodes of time a season, the show’s not able to go into the depth that the books do, and certain characters pay the price. Such as Sansa, whose character development and storyline in the books is much more realistic and well done. (As in, she doesn’t suddenly turn into a master manipulator within the course of a single episode.) Then there’s Tyrion, who may be much nicer than his book counterpart, but comes not even close to his level of complexity. And then there’s Margaery, who— okay, I have nothing bad to say about TV Margaery. The show handled her perfectly.

(Side note: I really feel bad for the fans who started reading the series back in 1996. Imagine waiting almost twenty years for an ending only to have it spoiled by the TV adaptation. Just to put in perspective as to how much of a wait that is: Hell, I wasn’t even alive back in 1996. This may seem weird, considering I’ve been told I give off the impression of an ageless, all-knowing god, but alas it is true. There are poor unfortunate fans out there who’ve waited longer than my entire lifetime for the end of this series, and there’s still at least two more installments to go.)

What I’m trying to say is, I’d rather experience the ending by the books than the TV show. But because the series probably won’t be ending for at least another four years. I know that won’t be possible, because there will be spoilers. Spoilers everywhere. And because there’s no chance in hell The Winds of Winter will come before the end of season 5, I’m just going to watch this season and hope TWoW comes out before season 6.

So for anyone reading for the sole purpose of finding out whether I’m going to be reviewing this season’s episodes or not, the answer is yes, I will.

Better brace yourselves, readers, because my reviewing skills have improved tenfold since last summer. I’m like a reviewing wizard at this point. Zap! Zap!

That was the sound of my wizard curses, by the way.

Zap zap!

A Slightly Belated Valentine’s Day Post

I’m back, bitches!

Sorry for the profanity. I just felt like adding “bitches” to the sentence would add more punch to it, so to speak. Anywho, I was recently nominated for two valentine’s day-themed awards, and while admittedly it’s no longer Valentine’s day, it’s still never too late to talk about the romance. (Ladies?)

So thank you, Engie, for nominating me. Oh, and thank you for that eCard thingy you sent me a few weeks back, which I will not reveal to the readers for sole purpose of being coy. You have no idea how happy that made me.

To start off with the first award, the Be My Valentine Book Tag:

Who is your favorite couple in a book?

Gregor and Luxa from the Underland Chronicles. They were adorable, in a slightly painful-to-watch sort of way.

Which book character would you take to dinner if you could?

As in, a date? Because I ain’t paying no check. And I’d feel bad if she had to pay for the whole thing, so I’d have to pick a character willing to dine and dash. Therefore, I pick Cameron Post, because she’s not likely to be fussy about taking things without paying.

Of course, it’s very, very unlikely that Cam (can I call her Cam?) would be interested in me. (Read the book, people!) So instead I’ll go with Blue Sargent, from The Raven Cycle. I feel like the two of us would get along well. We both similar senses of humor, sort of.

Villains deserve a little love, too. Which villain would you give a box of chocolates to?

Hm, could I pick Fiona from my own story, More Than I Can Chew? Because sure, she sort of ruined everything for everyone, but she still had one hell of a rough day.

No, Matt. You can’t choose your own character, you obnoxious egomaniac.

Fine then. I choose Daenerys Targaryen, who could be considered a villain, depending on who you ask. She’d probably be all, “What’s this?” And I’d say, “It’s chocolate,” and she’d say, “What in the seven hells is chocolate?” And then I’d have to explain the whole concept and manage to convince her it’s not poison. Hopefully she’d find the chocolate so delicious that she decides to stop pursuing the iron throne to start a chocolate milk factory, giving her army and dragons to me instead.

Be a Matchmaker; pick two characters from two different stories and pair them up.

Samantha Black Crow (American Gods) with an adult Cameron Post (Miseducation of Cameron Post). I just figured, they’re both really cool characters, so if they get together they’d be twice as cool.

What book setting would you like to visit while on a date?

Dorne, from A Song of Ice and Fire. As of the latest book, it’s easily the most peaceful and most tolerant of the seven kingdoms. Not to mention, with winter coming, I’d want to be as far south as possible. Those white walkers, am I right?

It’s not all about romance. What’s your favorite non-romantic relationship in a novel?

Paul Sheldon and Annie Wilkes. (I feel like I’m going about this question the wrong way . . .)

Venturing out of the book sphere for a bit: What song makes you feel loved?

“I Got You Babe,” by Etta James. This song wouldn’t be nearly as great if I didn’t connect it with this scene from The Last of Us:

Who is your favorite couple in a movie/TV show?

Frank and Claire Underwood from House of Cards. They’re both terrible people, but as a couple they are very unique, not to mention powerful. And neither of them seem to have any qualms about a spontaneous three-way with their security guard, which is pretty cool.

Now for the most important question of all: What is your favorite shade of red?

Blue. Because fuck you, that’s why.

(Just so you all know, I’ve spent the last few days finishing the final season of The Wire, which may cause an increase in colorful language.)

And now for the second tag:

Favorite couple ever? You want to have their relationship.

Eleanor and Park, because they fit together, like milk and cookies, or handstands and foot rubs.

Relationship that never happened? You wanted them to get together, but they never did.

Two certain characters from The Book Thief. I will not say more for spoilers’ sake, and because after three years I still find it a bit tough to talk about. #brokenheartsstaybroken.

Your bookish crush?

Hmm… I’m a huge fan of post-AGOT Sansa Stark, and am a huge fan of her from ASOS on.

Favorite “feel good” romance?

By this, do you mean a romance book with a happy ending? Because all the love stories I read tend to be tragedies. I guess I’d have to go with Paper Towns, where the romance was probably the least “feel good” part of the novel. Margo was sort of kind of a little bit of a terrible, terrible person, and Quentin was unhealthily obsessed with her. But hey, they were adorable as kids together.

(I think I’m going to write a “In Defense of Paper Towns” post one day, because lately I’ve been seeing a lot of criticisms of that book. And while everyone’s entitled to their opinions and whatnot, I do feel like some people are kind of… missing the point. Will discuss later. Possibly.)

Favorite genre to add romance to?

I don’t know. Urban fantasy? I say this because The Raven Cycle is the only urban fantasy series I think I’ve read, and the romance was great, and no one can say otherwise.

And that is all for questions. I refuse to nominate anyone because Valentine’s Day has come and past. Also, Valentine’s is a pretty stupid holiday anyway, essentially a Scam created by Evil Corporations so we’d Spend Money, or at least that’s I hear from a couple billion or so people each year.

To end this post, here’s a picture of two giraffes in love.

In Which I Can’t Think of a Proper Title for this Post (TCWT)

Huzzah! January’s TCWT Blog Chain is here, and this month’s prompt is:

“What is something you feel is generally written well in fiction? What is something you feel is generally written poorly?”

Well, if I had to pick one thing that bugs me, it’s the young adult genre’s tendency to romanticize or overlook creepy behavior. An obvious example is Twilight, where Edward watches Bella while she sleeps and this is considered perfectly fine, but I’m not going to bring that up because 1) bashing Twilight is so 2009, and 2) I haven’t actually read it; everything I know about the series I’ve heard from other people. So instead I’m going to talk about another terrible young adult novel, The Fifth Wave.

Now, I originally gave The Fifth Wave a three out of five stars, but my opinion of it has slowly but surely decreased over time, to the point where it’s now a one out of five. I tried reading its sequel, but I got roughly fifteen pages into it before being forced to light the book on fire, whilst chanting “Burn, demon, burn!” the whole time.

(Warning: There are spoilers. But The Fifth Wave isn’t worth reading anyway so it’s fine if you read ahead.)

Anywho, the main character (Cassie) falls in love with Evan, a guy who is actually an alien from outer space sent to help murder all of mankind. And that’s not even the worst thing about him. No, he continues to do creepy things like:

  • Bathe Cassie while she’s unconscious.
  • Read Cassie’s diary without her permission.
  • Not allow her to leave his house. “If you try to leave, I’ll just follow. You can’t stop me, Cassie.”

Yet Cassie falls in love with him anyway. Why? Because he’s hot. He’s like, super muscular, and his eyes are all warm and chocolatey. The fact that he is attractive (we know this because the author/Cassie constantly feels the need to let us know how hot he is) apparently makes up for his unhealthy behavior. This all leads up to a contrived love triangle where Cassie is stuck deciding between creepy stalker Evan and boring, perfect Ben. Which leads us to. . .

Love triangles. Young adult books are terrible at them. At best they feel like a waste of time and at worst they make me want to steal candy from a baby. (Because why the hell would you give a baby candy anyway? It’s not like s/he’s going to remember it.) I hate young adult love triangles so much that in my current WIP, I purposely set up the beginning of a love triangle just to kill off two sides at once. Why? Because fuck triangles, that’s why. Triangles are for squares.

[Exception: The Raven Cycle, by Maggie Stievfater. All the character dynamics in that series feel natural and realistic, which is just one of the things that makes it the best ongoing young adult series I’ve ever read.]

Now, to abruptly change the subject: let’s talk about dialogue. Specifically, dialogue in fantasy novels, and how it has a tendency to feel overly clever and fake, as if the author is trying way too hard to be witty. Take this little snippet from The Way of Kings, by Brandon Sanderson:

”I can see you are a woman of discriminating taste.”

“I am. I do like my meals prepared very carefully, as my palate is quite delicate.”

“Pardon. I meant that you have discriminating taste in books.”

Oh snap!

The book is filled with lines like that. I assume they are meant to lighten the mood and they do, sort of. (I always end up cringing, and said cringe makes me forget about all the bloodshed and death.) At first I thought that the character was intentionally written with a bad sense of humor and that no one else wanted to tell her this because they didn’t want to hurt her feelings. But having read Mistborn and half of Words of Radiance, I’ve come to the conclusion that the author is simply not that great at this whole “humor” thing, and that’s okay.* After all, not everyone can be as hilarious as me.

But I feel like this is a consistent problem in the fantasy genre, at least of what I’ve read of it, which admittedly isn’t much. Even A Song of Ice and Fire, which has the highest hit-to-miss joke ratio of any fantasy series I’ve read, occasionally includes a line or two that made me think, “No one would ever say that, or if they did, they would be immediately punched in the face.” This needs to stop.

On the bright side, I believe that epic fantasies are great when it comes to getting the reader invested in the characters. I’m pretty sure this has to do with the sheer amount of time you get to spend with the main characters. If you spent over a thousand plus pages with a character and don’t at least form some sort of attachment with him or her, you are either a terrible person incapable of empathy or the writer is simply not that good.

Because the twelfth of January is about to pass, this post must come to a premature end. Sorry if I rambled too much in this post, or if it was incoherent. Rest assured that it will be edited and revised the moment after I get some sleep. Here’s a list of all the other participants:



7thhttps://erinkenobi2893.wordpress.com/ andhttp://nasrielsfanfics.wordpress.com/






















29th – https://teenscanwritetoo.wordpress.com/ (We’ll announce the topic for next month’s chain.)

*I mean, Sanderson is a boss when it comes to everything else.

Why Splitting Mockingjay was for the Best

(Caution: spoilers galore for the events of Mockingjay, by Suzanne Collins)

So I just recently watched Mockingjay: Part One, and I’ve come to two conclusions:

1) I don’t usually condone murder, but someone needs to kill that guy behind me who kept clapping every ten minutes. Yes, Katniss shooting down a plane with a bow and arrow is cool and all, but it is not cool enough to warrant an obnoxious clap while people are sitting right in front of you. What is the point of “clapping” anyway? Who exactly thought that smacking your hands together loudly should be a good way of expressing your approval? Oh, and also:

2) While splitting Mockingjay was almost definitely a decision motivated by greed, that doesn’t matter much because it all worked out perfectly.

I liked the book and all, but the last third of it was a tiny bit rushed and confusing. If Mockingjay was made into one single installment, it would’ve made an even more rushed and even more confusing movie. Katniss’s PTSD would not have been explored to nearly as much an extent, every single one of Effie’s scenes would’ve been cut, and that whole Hanging Tree segment probably never would’ve happened, which would suck because that song was quite possibly the best scene in the whole series, if measured in the amount of chills it gave me. I mean seriously, I’m listening to it right now, and I just shed a mockingjay-shaped tear.

If Mockingjay was made into one two and a half hour movie, at least half of Part 1 would’ve had to be cut. I can only think of two, maybe three scenes from that Part 1 I’d be willing to get rid of, let alone an entire hour’s worth. Not to mention the sheer amount of character development we’d lose in a single adaptation. Prim, Finnick, and Johanna barely get enough screentime as it is. Their deaths would be utterly meaningless* to those who haven’t read the books, and disappointing to those who have, if their screentime was limited to a single movie.

But really, the one thing everyone on the internet seem to be forgetting is that the book itself is split into two very distinctive parts. Katniss’s entire motivation in the first half is to do what she can to save Peeta, while she spends the second half getting to grips with his condition as Peeta slowly heals. And the first half focuses on the use of war propaganda as both sides try to manipulate the districts into joining their cause, while the second half focuses on the war that results. In the words of producer Nina Jacobsen, “Mockingjay 1 is about the propaganda war, Mockingjay 2 is about war.”

Not to mention, if Mockingjay was only made into one movie, Natalie Dormer never would’ve been casted. And that would be a tragedy.

*Prim and Finnick’s deaths, I mean. Not Johanna’s.

Guest Post: The Worst Types of Book Endings

Ha, didn’t guess that, did you? I’m referring to anyone who tried to guess what this post would be about. I guess this is sort of cheating, since I didn’t actually write this post, but I’m sure you’ll understand, because the fantastic Nirvana has won that whole guest post award contest. Better luck next time, those who wanted to win it. There’s still the 3,000th comment you can be the author of.

Anywho, thank you for doing this, Nirvana. And don’t forget that you are allowed to respond to every comment as if this was your own blog.


The ending of the book, in my mind, is the most important part. Even if the book sucked, I’ll still consider the book good if the author redeemed himself in the end.


Okay, not everything. A lot of other things count too: characters, plot, villains. I have a tendency to exaggerate. (My sister agrees, having the ginormous nerve to ignore the daggers I’m mentally shooting at her. My defense: I’m a writer. I exaggerate for a  living. At least I will, when I’ve completed my bestselling novel and all, that is.)

But I digress. Enough rambling and onto the post.

The worst types of book endings…

Capture 1. The infamous ‘Happily Ever After’

I can’t believe I just wrote this. I HATE my favourite characters dying. The angst. The pain. The way the writer picks the exact chap I had fallen in love with, and kills him. Authors are demons in disguise. Though I’m an angel.  Their books break me into little pieces, put me back together and tear me apart again. Wouldn’t a cutesy ending be nice?


But after all that, I still hate ’em. Hate the neatly wrapped up ending with the ‘and they lived happily ever after’. I sort of enjoy the angst, actually. The hair-tearing sense of foreboding, the bouts of sobbing. Because in the end, life is that way. You don’t get the prince (he dies), and if it’s war: I WANT SOME SACRIFICE.

One book I’ll take as an example, will be Blood of Olympus. The book was fab, but the ending was too cutesy and unrealistic. And the battle against Gaea was too easy. (An epilogue would have been nice too, Rick)

2. Dues ex Machina


Another book ending ruiner: dues ex machina.

Where the solution just drops out of the sky, no excuses whatsoever. Just the author who couldn’t come up with a solution to explain this sudden turn of events.

I mean, if you really need to use this, do it in a way so that it doesn’t ruin the book. Drop subtle hints throughout the book so the reader thinks ‘Hey, why didn’t I guess so? OOH I REMEMBER. THEY MENTIONED IT AT THE START OMG’

3.I wanna know what happens next.


Please don’t leave the readers in the dark. They need to know what happens. No point in tormenting us further, is there?

It’s fine to leave a hint of mystery when you end a book/series. It’s the best kind of ending. The kind that makes you think, and wonder. But there is a fine line between not having an epilogue or something but properly ending it. So it seems like an ending. Making the ending seem like the book is missing some pages and you need to get it replaced, is not okay.

And that’s it, folks. What kind of endings do you hate. Any particular book in mind?


Also, I forgot to mention: Check out Nirvana’s blog! If she doesn’t gain five hundred followers within the next five minutes, I will start throwing fists.

Characters Who Deserve Their Own Books

So, I discovered this prompt from Engie, who found it on The Broke and the Bookish, which appears to be a pretty great blog. So I’m going to try out the tag, for what I’m pretty sure is the first time. You can join the tag too, right here.

Now, to get straight to it:

Not his most flattering picture, I admit.

Hot Pie from A Song of Ice and Fire

An orphaned baker boy originally headed towards the wall, I’ve loved Hot Pie from the start. Well, maybe not immediately, when he was pretending to be all tough and hardcore to Arya. But through the course of the series you see this angry bully facade of his quickly disappear, replaced with a scared and innocent child who has to survive the giant clusterfuck that is the war-torn Riverlands of Westeros. Seriously, this kid goes through just as much hell as Arya, and yet his attitude towards life actually seems to improve because of it, so, um, good for him.

I’d also like to have a small book dedicated towards Gendry, The Hound, Yoren, or pretty much anyone that has interacted with Arya from seasons 2-4 of Game of Thrones.

Isaac, from The Fault in Our Stars, by John Green

Recently I’ve really wanted to reread this book, and not because of all the phrases that aren’t das deep as people seem to think they are (“That’s the thing about pain. It demands to be felt.”), but because of Isaac, and his whole storyline.

Isaac was diagnosed with a type of cancer that required him to have one of his eyes surgically removed when he was a child. “No biggie,” you may say. “He still has the other eye, right?”

Nope. He later had to get his other eye surgically removed, making him permanently blind. As someone who likes to read, write, and juggle, I would be a complete wreck if this happened to me. And so is Isaac. He is a complete wreck. Very pissed off at the world for a while, and yet he still manages to keep going, and even have a good sense of humor about it. “Come over here so I can examine your face with my hands and see deeper into your soul than a sighted person ever could,” he says to Hazel, shortly after getting his final eye taken out.

Isaac is easily the most interesting character in this whole book, and yet he gets sidelined by Hazel and Gus’s “okays,” even more so in the second half. *tears up*

Speaking of which, does Isaac have a stated last name? Because if so, I am drawing a huge blank on it.

Sam Black Crow, from American Gods, by Neil Gaiman.

“I can believe things that are true and things that aren’t true and I can believe things where nobody knows if they’re true or not.

I can believe in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny and the Beatles and Marilyn Monroe and Elvis and Mister Ed. Listen – I believe that people are perfectable, that knowledge is infinite, that the world is run by secret banking cartels and is visited by aliens on a regular basis, nice ones that look like wrinkled lemurs and bad ones who mutilate cattle and want our water and our women.

I believe that the future sucks and I believe that the future rocks and I believe that one day White Buffalo Woman is going to come back and kick everyone’s ass. I believe that all men are just overgrown boys with deep problems communicating and that the decline in good sex in America is coincident with the decline in drive-in movie theaters from state to state.

I believe that all politicians are unprincipled crooks and I still believe that they are better than the alternative. I believe that California is going to sink into the sea when the big one comes, while Florida is going to dissolve into madness and alligators and toxic waste.

I believe that antibacterial soap is destroying our resistance to dirt and disease so that one day we’ll all be wiped out by the common cold like martians in War of the Worlds.

I believe that the greatest poets of the last century were Edith Sitwell and Don Marquis, that jade is dried dragon sperm, and that thousands of years ago in a former life I was a one-armed Siberian shaman.

I believe that mankind’s destiny lies in the stars. I believe that candy really did taste better when I was a kid, that it’s aerodynamically impossible for a bumble bee to fly, that light is a wave and a particle, that there’s a cat in a box somewhere who’s alive and dead at the same time (although if they don’t ever open the box to feed it it’ll eventually just be two different kinds of dead), and that there are stars in the universe billions of years older than the universe itself.

I believe in a personal god who cares about me and worries and oversees everything I do. I believe in an impersonal god who set the universe in motion and went off to hang with her girlfriends and doesn’t even know that I’m alive. I believe in an empty and godless universe of causal chaos, background noise, and sheer blind luck.

I believe that anyone who says sex is overrated just hasn’t done it properly. I believe that anyone who claims to know what’s going on will lie about the little things too.

I believe in absolute honesty and sensible social lies. I believe in a woman’s right to choose, a baby’s right to live, that while all human life is sacred there’s nothing wrong with the death penalty if you can trust the legal system implicitly, and that no one but a moron would ever trust the legal system.

I believe that life is a game, that life is a cruel joke, and that life is what happens when you’re alive and that you might as well lie back and enjoy it.”

Yeah, Sam is awesome. I can’t wait to see her in the TV adaptation. (Yep, that’s happening.)

I know this is only three characters, but I’m very, very tired, and besides, I’m setting myself up for a possible sequel to this post. Keep your eyes on the horizon, readers. The blogging horizon, that is.

I Guess You Could Say This Has Been a Success

Today the young adult blog party comes to an end. I’m sure they’ll be a late post or two, which I’ll be happy to include in the list of links on this post. My expectations were surpassed, I must say, and I’m glad that I don’t have to look back at this post in shame and pretend it never existed.

Also, this was a clever way for me to not post that much. My internet access this week has been limited, so it was nice to be able to write quick posts like these (although linking to other blogs on my phone is hard to do).

This post includes a link to everyone who participated in the party. If you’re just showing up, be sure to check these out.

Brook: What Adults Can Learn From YA

Literary Vittles: YA Lit Author Spotlight: Jacqueline Woodson.

Candace Habte: Greatful for Being Scarred: Death in YA

Euphonic Charity: Relationship Advice from YA Literature (and why I avoid it).

Tess the dancer: Ten Things I Love and Hate About YA Books.

Tiger Lily: Young and Sweet, Tell Me What to Read: YA Literature.

S: Looking for Alaska.

Pinkdoughnuts: I’m Just Going To Make This A Really Long Title Since This is Such a Long Post.

Charlotte Hall: Young Adult Blog Party: Do Authors Have a Responsibility to Their Readers?

Susannah Ailene Martin: Christian YA Books and the Peculiarity of Peretti.

TheLegendaryMiko: Squirrel Fun I

Maddvmilliner: Young Adult Blog Part Edition

Catdiggedydog: Why You Should Read More Books

Infected Mongoose: Young Adult Fiction

Me: My Favorite Young Adult Writers.

Thanks to everyone who participated! You will all be mentioned in my biography.

My Super Awesome Time Travel Novella: Chapter 1

This post was both inspired by both Liam’s Phil Phorce and Jeyna Grace’s Fan Fiction Novel, both of which are amazing. So I decided to write something similar to my blog much like what they’re doing except the plot is completely different (At least so far. I’m only just starting episode 2 of Phil Phorce and eight chapters into Jenna’s novel). It’s a Sci-fi Comedy about time travel with a bit of romance thrown in.

This isn’t a serious novel that I expect to get published or anything, but more of a fun story to entertain all you people. And to avoid confusion, the actual title of this novella is “My Super Awesome Time Travel Novella.”

Also, feel free to criticize my work as much as you want. Seriously, I need criticism.

Chapter 1: This is Really More of a Prologue

Chloe Brooks is quite possibly the coolest girl I’ve ever met, and that’s not the type of compliment I pass around lightly. She’s charming, lovably geeky and contains the greatest sense of humor a guy like me could ask for. For me at least, she’s perfect.

Oddly enough, I barely knew who she was until 2 months into my Freshman year of High School. I remember it with exceptional accuracy: it was halfway through eighth period Social Studies, and I had just recently been dumped by this girl named Vicky who was upset that I never took anything seriously. This is partially true–but to be fair we had only dated for a week, and she was annoying. Meanwhile, Chloe was dating some jerk named Dennis.

(Quick note: Dennis is actually a nice, respectable guy, but this story works much better if you imagine him as jerk.)

“…Women rarely owned property, due to the prejudice views towards women during this period of time,” said Mrs. Rippa’s monotonous voice. Her last word caused me to reference a famous quote from Doctor Who, even though I knew no one would understand it.

“People assume that time is a strict progression of cause and effect, but actually, from a non linear, non-subjective viewpoint–” I stopped, feeling the blank stares of the whole classroom upon me, wondering just what the hell I was talking about. That’s the problem with going to my school– you could make hundreds of references to Doctor Who and no one will get them. Up until that point I was sure I was the only Whovian within miles of my town.

“–It’s more like a big ball of wibbly-wobbly… timey-wimey… stuff,” said a lovely voice from the back of the classroom. The moment I heard it I found myself smiling uncontrollably.

I looked back to see Chloe Brooks, this girl who I almost never talked to before in my life, who hung out in a completely different group of friends and always sat in the same seat, four rows back and to the very side where no one ever looked, smiling at me with inside knowledge that suggested we were close friends. We stared at each other for what seemed like a long time before this kid next to me named Jimmy snapped me out of it.

“What the hell are you guys talking about?”

One annoying kid in the back asked almost the exact same question, and soon the whole class erupted into the loud chatter that was the most familiar sound in 8th period Social Studies, and within thirty seconds everyone had forgotten about that little incident but me. Oh how I love public school.

After that, Chloe and I became good friends. At first we bonded over our mutual love for Doctor Who, but our list of discussion topics expanded exponentially until I was closer to her than she was with some of her other friends. After a month or two she finally broke up with that jerk Dennis and a week later we started going out. The next six months were the probably one of the best six months of my life.

Anyway, the reason I’m telling you all this is because just five minutes ago I shot her in the face with my uncle’s pump-action shotgun and left her corpse in the woods to rot.

Don’t give me that look–it’s not what it sounds like. Because even though she’s almost definitely dead right now, I’m still sitting next to a living, breathing, fifteen year-old Chloe Brooks. She, at least, is as happy as ever, and hasn’t been shot in the face. Yet.

That’s the problem with being a time traveler. Once you screw up, you screw up for good, and there’s no way to take it back unless you come up with an overly complicated plan and/or you create a giant paradox that destroys the universe, and no one wants to do all that.

There are three things you need to know before you ever attempt to time travel:

  1. Time is not actually a big ball of wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey stuff. It’s really just one long, boring line that makes occasional slight turns.

  2. Don’t mess with your past self, your future self, your ancestors, or any historical figure, no matter how evil he/she is. In fact, avoid the past altogether. Traveling to the past for too long inevitably leads to you no longer existing.

  3. Time travel sucks.

I know I probably sound like an expert on time travel at the moment, but I’m really not. I’ve really only been traveling for a day or two, maybe three. It’s tough to keep track of time because in the time travel business, you rarely spend a full day in a specific time period. A lot  of crazy stuff has happened since I started time traveling. After all this, I simply zapped back to where I was seconds after I first started.

You’re probably very confused right now, and that’s understandable. I don’t think you even know my name. But don’t worry; I’m going to tell you everything you need to know, starting with how I became a time traveler to being with. It’s a funny story.


So what do you think? If this post doesn’t get a lot of views, I’ll probably stop writing these altogether. But hopefully that won’t happen. If you have any suggestions, criticisms, or questions of any sort, please comment below.

Also, you know that guest post contest I’m holding for the author of the 200th comment? I’m currently at comment 188.