(Updated version.)
About me:
I go by the name of Matthew Black. I am not only secretly a ninja but I’m also secretly a master at shooting rubber bands, (I once hit a water bottle from fifty feet away with a rubber band, no joke). I’ve been blogging for over three years now, and I don’t regret it.
Some facts about me:
- I’m a senior in high school.
- I’ve been described as sarcastic, a bit of an idiot, a low-key genius, and a badass, though never at the same time.
- My list of favorite authors ever include George R. R. Martin, Maggie Stiefvater, Suzanne Collins, Steven King, Neil Gaiman, Markus Zusak and Emily Danforth,
- Favorite TV shows include The Leftovers, Doctor Who, Jessica Jones, Lost, The Wire, Veep, and Game of Thrones, although I have a bit of a love-hate relationship with the latter.
- Favorite movies include Mad Max, The Dark Knight, Interstellar, Memento (anything by Christopher Nolan, really), Finding Nemo, The Bourne Identity, The Shawshank Redemption, etc.
- I’m a fan of movie and TV show soundtracks.
- I work at McDonald’s.
- I’m from upstate New York.
- I occasionally wear hats.
- I smoke pot, but only because it makes me look cool.
- I occasionally tell ridiculous lies just to mess with people, like that one time I claimed I was a child rapper. (Mattybraps!)
- I’ve never owned a dog, and I’m still upset about it.
The Little Engine that Couldn't 
You’re a mankler/sparkitor? Gasp! I thought I’d never see another one outside the realm of Sparklife itself.
Yep, I am a proud Mankler. I think we’re an endangered specie, though, because you’re the first mankler/sparkitor I’ve outside the site as well before you. Coincidence? I think not.
Definitely endangered. Half the posts now are about prom and makeup. Are you a fan of The MindHut?
I usually start off on sparklife and then wander on to The Mindhut. And yes, the prom and makeup posts are annoying (and they wonder why Manklers are so rare!). I usually go on Sparklife for Dan Bergstein.
What would SparkLife be without Dan the Man? I’ve died of laughter (multiple times) when reading his articles. I’d love to do a blogging [insert book title] on my own blog. I’m a girl, but the “girly” posts are not my favorite. Makeup tutorials are nowhere near as entertaining as the deliciously blatant Auntie Sparknotes or the hilarious Jon Skindzier. But I always feel swindled when i click on an interesting article and it takes me to the MindHut. The article itself is great, but the MindHut site is too green…and green is my favorite color! SparkLife has a better layout.
While the Mindhut is a little too green, I think it deserves a lot more attention than it gets. I always feel bad when I see an awesome post with only one or two comments.
Oh and Jon Skindzier is the best.
Wooh! Teen writers unite!
Fuck… where’d I put the power rings…
Speaking of Little Engines, it’s better to be the one then couldn’t than the one in Major Payne. Which makes absolutely no sense if you haven’t seen that move.
I should probably say hi.
Hi! I’m Avery! Which is a pseudonym.
I may also be insane, but that’s for you and the doctors to decide. 😀
Hi Avery.
The doctors and I have decided that you are indeed, insane. But that’s okay; sanity is completely overrated.
You have been nominated for the Sunshine award. ❤
http://charlottecarrendar.com/2013/04/29/the-sunshine-award/
Thanks, but I’ll probably not going to do it. Nothing against you or anything, I’m just not a fan of doing award posts anymore.
No worries, its the thought that counts. Thanks for the reply. ❤
*Note* This is not a pity like.
I am also a teenager and also despair at how some people immediately decide this means you have nothing to say.
I can’t wait for the posts on sunshine and lollipops. 😛
The post is on it’s way! Sometime in the near future, probably…
The fact that “The Dark Knight Trilogy” is top of the list is enough to make me skip the rest and comment.
Well darn … now I have nothing else to comment on.
Starting with our similarities, I’m a teenager too. And I’m a writer, too. And I’m a Dark Knight fan, too. Moving on to our differences, I’m a newborn blogger and you’re not. But I’m looking forward to being your follower from this hour forth. If you’re ever bored or curious or maybe feeling charitable, drop by my blog. At the moment it’s barren and empty and I can’t guarantee that the things I’ll have to say will always be stellar or exciting, but keep it in the back of your head or something.
Hope we can get to know each other more in the near future. (Really dig this blog title, by the way.)
Thanks for commenting! And sorry I’ve taken so long to respond. I’ve been neglecting WordPress for a while now for a reason unknown to myself. That being said, I will definitely check out your blog soon. 🙂
The Dark Knight was awesome.
Unsolicited advice from WordPress addict: settle on a permanent title and just have fun changing the sentence beneath it from time to time. It will give you brand recognition so people can find you on WordPress and still allow you creative license to weird them out at will when they visit. Hell, they may stop by just to see today’s subheading.
That’s a great idea, one I’m sure to try once I remember how to change the subheading.
Also, I’ve managed to surprise myself; I haven’t changed my blog theme/title at all since I wrote this, which is completely unlike me.
To change your “tagline,” as they call it:
1. Dashboard
2. Appearance
3. Themes
4. Customize
5. Site Title (menu is on far right)
6. Tagline
7. Saved
I like you. You are one of my favorite fellow teen bloggers.
Thank you for the kind words, fellow teen blogger.
You’re very welcome.
This place is like a watering hole for teenage writers! xD Welcome comrade, share a non-alcoholic beer with us! And feel free to check out my teenage blog too! It’s more of a niche interest thing, so it won’t necessarily appeal to you, but if you like the same kinds of books as I do, you’ll enjoy it.
I checked out your blog and loved it—especially the dystopian post. Needless to say, I’m following you now.
Many thanks. I’ll be here all week!
I found your recent article “how to be a teen writer without making me want to punch you in the face” and I agree on those guidelines. Like you I’am a teen blogger and I blog about political stuff most people wouldn’t want to hear about the government but when I tell them my age they stop reading my blog (http://josephhoyne.wordpress.com/). It’s good to know that others experience the same thing.
I could imagine that getting really annoying. When it comes to politics, teenagers’ opinions are devalued a million times worse than they are when it comes to writing. At least in my experience.
Hi Matt! I just read your post about “How to be a teen writer without making me want to punch you in the face,” and it really inspired me. I write a fashion/lifestyle (???) blog and I try to write well, but I always feel to lazy to actually put in some real effort and I have a tendency to want to let my images speak for themselves because of the visual nature of the fashion and beauty world. I honestly am not that terrible of a writer (at least according to my English teachers) and the writing on my blog does not reflect that. After reading your post, I realized that a. I am such a loser in comparison and b. I will from now on not post something unless I am satisfied with the overall quality of it. Over the past summer I really tried to raise the image quality of my blog, and now I will work on raising the writing quality of my blog. It was a great post, and please keep up the good work.
You’re secretly a ninja, too? *squints eyes* Ah so…
I was never here…
But great blog… I look forward to reading more…
Neither was I…
(But thank you.)
man, i never read anything big big kind of thing, but then i read one of your article, man it was wow. You’re really good, btw can i just get some suggestions on good writing, my ideas are good, but when it comes to writing i suck, actually not that much but i do. Help, and you are ❤
Yo, I’m a teen blogger too. I love your blog! Following you now, and it’d be rad if you checked out mine too – neverstationary.wordpress.com
– Catherine
I suddenly like you… I dunno if it’s all the gummy bears I’ve had or maybe it’s got something to do with the empty cans of Dr. Pepper under my bed, but I like you. Just thought you should know that.
Your Welcome.
P.S. You’re blog’s a joy to read mate! Now time to stalk it….and forget about all the shit I’ve got to do…
Hey there Matthew!
Just thought I’d thought first let you know that I am a big fan of your blog! You have some really great content in here 😀
I was wondering, though, if you would be interested in doing a blog interview with me on your blog, and then a blog interview with you on my blog? My blog is http://anauthorsadventure.wordpress.com/ if you want to check it out first.
Looking forward to your reply!
I challenge you to a rubber band shooting competition. The twist is that we shoot rubber bands at each other, which inadvertently results in a ninja skills competition. Also, the “rubber bands” are actually ninja stars.
Just kidding, you will obviously decline my challenge due to sheer fear. However, I would appreciate if you checked my blog out. I just started it today and would love feedback from a fellow teen blogger!
I’ve accepted your challenge. In fact, I’ve already shot a rubber band in your general direction, so for the next few days you should probably be keeping watch on the sky, just to be safe.
Hey there!
I recently stumbled upon your blog and like I always do with any new blog I find, I went through some of your latest posts and read a few chapters of your novella and I found it quite interesting. Your sense of humor and writing skills are really nice and I hope you do very well with this blog!
Anyways, I was wondering if you would like to participate in something called “My Writing Process Blog Tour”. If you’re interested, then please e-mail me at ifraha.theforum@outlook.com
I’ll be waiting for a response!
Regards,
Ifrah A.
Hey, Matt! I wanted to let you know that I’ve nominated you for the Sunshine Award.
http://susannahailenemartin.wordpress.com/2013/11/21/ive-been-awarded/
Matt, you have a strong voice! If people turn away from your blog simply because you’re a teenager, then they are rather sad. 🙂
Hey Matt! As two teen writers, we ought to team up one day and guest post on each others’ blogs! I bet that’d be exciting and spark lots of conversation – let me know if you want to give that a try! – Catherine (NeverStationary)
Thanks, but I’m going to have to decline. I only include guest posts on my blog for people win the comment contest (as in, the author of the 200th/500th/1,000th (and so on) comment get awarded a guest post.)
Sorry for the late response, by the way.
No problem! 🙂
Hello Matt! This comment is going to be a little long, so you might want to go make some hot chocolate or something and sit down to read it. But fear not–I know how to spell and don’t swear for the sake of swearing.
Okay, so I have a question regarding blogging–because I am technologically inept–and also want to compliment you. And I promise I’m not complimenting you just because I have a question.
So first of all–I love your blog! (It’s actually the only reason I decided to have my own blog here) Even if I don’t know about most of the books you blog about(I’m not into fantasy) you have an amazing voice as a writer. I checked out this handbook for teen writers and it spent a chapter talking about author voices–and it reminded me of your blog.
(Oh and if you ever need a LGBT book recommendation–I am your girl)
So now I have a question–you know how you have those little bars for about and super awesome novel type stuff at the top of your blog? How does one add anew page? Because I need one for my webcomic, and right now I am sitting at the computer growing steadily more frustrated because I can’t find out how to do it. So if you could point me in the right direction, I would be grateful.
*I never know how to close comments*
Nicki c:
Hi! Sorry I took so long to respond.
Because I’m really bad at explaining things on the computer, here’s a link to a WordPress article explaining how to add a new page. http://codex.wordpress.org/Pages_Add_New_Screen I hope it helps. And thanks for the compliment. 🙂
hey there I just though I would let you know that I nominated you for a very inspiring blogger award check out my post : http://caffeinatedelfling.wordpress.com/2014/01/03/apparently-my-rambles-are-worth-something/ and keep on being your awesome self
howdy! Just wanted to let you know that I added you to my new, permanent “Blogroll” page on my site. I figured I ought to do this because I keep losing track of blog awards. http://literaryvittles.wordpress.com/blogroll/
hey, I was wondering if you’d want to answer a few questions about your writing process for a book tour?
If you’d be willing, get back to me at my blog: alysinunderland.wordpress.com
Thanks,
Alys.
Sure! I hope it’s not too late though; sorry I took so long to respond.
It’s not too late! have you got an email address that you don’t mind me using to send you the information?
Sure. it’s Mattthewblack42@gmail.com
You’re a wise and interesting young writer – power on…
AnnMarie
50 now – was much wiser when I was much younger
Wit is wit regardless of age and is a highly respectable quality. I respect any level of wit, snark, humor, sarcasm and the freedom of a good old F bomb. This about section has me intrigued…..I will follow so don’t be disappointing 🙂
I’ll try not to. Welcome aboard.
Your blog caught my eye because of the Game of Thrones post, which is awesome because I am obsessed with the HBO series. Sadly, I haven’t read any of the books because of time. Anyways, please check out my new blog Arbitrary Pondering, where I post equivocal topics and hope for feedback. aptbsthoughts.blogspot.com
You hit a water bottle from fifty feet away with a rubber band. Congrats!!
Interesting blog by the way.
NSFS
Thank you! Yes I did, though unfortunately the rubber band didn’t hit it with enough force to knock it down. It just sort of wobbled it a bit. That still counts, right?
I guess so 🙂
Hello there! I’ve nominated you for the Sunshine Award!
https://musingsfromnevillesnavel.wordpress.com/2014/08/20/the-sunshine-award/
ayye i’m almost 13 so kind of teenager woot. from right now, i’m following you. I’m lame and you’re extremely funny. I suck at writing sorry. hi. gosh i’m bad.
Good luck with teenage life! (it’s all downhill from here, trust me). And you are not lame, by the way. I know because I immediately felt the need to follow your blog after reading your comment. *follows*
woah. you followed me. that’s pretty cool
*follows you again*
Hey! I just wanted to say, I love the way you write, it’s so much fun to read! 😀 I nominated you for the Real Neat Blog Award (here’s the link; https://theprotego.wordpress.com/2015/04/22/wordpress-blog-nomination/) but I just read your comment that you don’t do award posts anymore. Oh well, still just wanted to let you know, you’ve got a great blog! 😀
Thank you! I will probably do this, too. (I always say I won’t do award posts anymore, but usually I cave after a few months when I’m out of ideas.)
Hello!!
Stumbled across your blog on Twitter 🙂 And damnit, I love it. I’m going on a bit of a let’s-find-blogs-on-twitter-and-follow-them-like-a-creep phase. HAH. Anyway. Your posts are amazing. So is your blog. So is your page. Damnit, I am in awe!
Hello Elm! Sorry for the late reply, but thank you very much. And hey, who doesn’t go through that phase every once in a while?
Hullo! Don’t worry about it 🙂 And yes! So true 🙂
Hey Matt, do you have an email I can reach you at? Me and another blogger are planning a post about…well…I don’t think I’m going to tell anyone (muhahaha!). Anyway, it’d be cool if we could get blogger interviews, is it possible you’d be interested in giving an opinion on the unknown topic? 😛
Sure, I’d love to. The email’s matttblack42@gmail.com
Thanks!
Oh, I should probably have mentioned that my email has three t’s instead of two. A lot of times people will send it to mattblack42 instead of matttblack42 and they’ll get put off when I don’t respond. 🙂
Okay, I’m pretty sure I sent it with three t’s. I’ll check though, thanks 🙂
Well written “about” page, I like the one with child rapper 😀
That truly was an unusual time of my life. (The rapper lifestyle is not for me, as it turns out.)
Lol at least you have tried 😀
Hi! This is a long shot, I don’t know if you’ll even see this. But I was just going through my old blog and some of my old posts and people that I follow and I saw your blog. I just remember how much I loved reading it! I really loved the way you write and even though I didn’t know you in person, it still felt like you were my internet friend! Sorry if that sounds weird lol. I was just feeling really nostalgic going through all my old posts and some of yours and I just thought I would reach out and say hi. I hope you’re having a nice day and hope you see this comment.
Hey! Thanks for the lovely comment. I was just checking out this site on a sudden nostalgic whim for the first time in what must’ve been at least three years. So I did end up seeing your comment, just a little late!
I don’t think I get email notifications for this site anymore, but if you’re interested, you can find me on Twitter as @98MikeB. Since my last post on this blog, I’ve graduated college, started writing on Medium, gave up on writing on Medium, and now have a job writing for /Film. I also moved on from the pseudonym Matthew Black and started using my real name, Michael Boyle, in my bylines. (Although I go by Mike B on twitter.)
It was great to hear from you! It’s always so cool getting messages from people I met on through this blog. Opens up a lot of nice memories.
–Mike